I was following my usual routine this morning – sitting out the back having coffee and checking my electronic world. As I read my Twitter feed I saw that some “celebrity” over east had broken down on her radio program as she “confessed” to smoking cigarettes while she is pregnant. It had been her “dirty” little secret until some paparazzi photographer snapped her having a cigarette in her car
FFS – I know the world has gone mad, but really?????
I am tired of this idea that the fun police own each and every one of us. I am also tired that others think that they can tell us what to do and what not to do. Our greatest gift in this life is free will. Each of us in on our own journey in this physical world – and each of us answers to only one person…. ourselves… when our time in this world is done.
I spent the first 40 years of my life dancing to everybody else’s beat, and the next 10 learning to listen to the beat of my own drum and in time learning to dance to that, and the last 4 practising every day. I have not fully mastered it, but I am a hell of a lot better at it than I used to be.
We are responsible only for ourselves – and judgement of any kind is a toxin that seeps into our souls.
I have often been judged and chastised for being a smoker, and yes I did smoke through both my pregnancies, so maybe this particular issue struck a chord. When the pregnancy of my first child was confirmed I stopped smoking. On my next check up, my doctor was very alarmed at my blood pressure reading – it was extremely high – to the point of being dangerous. He asked what was going on & whether I had changed anything in the time since I last saw him. I told him I had stopped smoking, however I was finding it very difficult and was feeling very very stressed. Do you know what he said…. go outside and have a cigarette. The 5 to 10 cigarettes a day that I smoked would do my child far less harm than the high blood pressure I was experiencing. His view was that these things were very much individual – and what was good for one was not necessarily good for others. From that point forward I have endeavoured not to tell someone how they should or should not live their lives. Each to their own – I am not walking in their shoes.
People often question my spirituality – if I was really spiritual I wouldn’t smoke cigarettes, swear, wear makeup, wear lots of jewellery, wear pants, paint my toenails, drive a car…blah blah blah….(so I exaggerate sometimes to make a point). Not so long ago I was at a function and got up to go outside to have a cigarette. A guy that I was sitting with – about 50 kilos overweight – made some comment like “That’s it Sal… go and put another nail in your coffin” as he stuffed a handful of potato chips in his mouth. I said nothing – how we kill ourselves is our choice.
So as we go about our days and our nights, perhaps we can attempt to actually mind our own business. We are all human – none of us are perfect, and all of us are doing the best we can in any given moment, regardless of how “good” that best might be. My belief is that our purpose is to be the greatest version of the grandest vision we hold for ourselves, and depending on our level of self-awareness and our life experiences, we do the best we can. Remember, when we are pointing the finger at someone else, we have three coming straight back at us.
What other people think of me and how I go about my life is none of my business. The thoughts belong to them…. they are nothing to do with me.
Happy Hump Day 🙂